jo + alex / married

Jo + Alex found each other at opposite ends of the globe. I just love it when that happens. I find it completely incredible that this world is so gigantic, yet so small, all at the same time. Love finds people when they are least expecting it. These two included. I'll tell their whole story, in pictures, very soon. Until then, here they are in moving pictures.

reconnecting

The husband turned forty back in March - toward the beginning of the horrible solo parenting marathon that brought me to my knees. What a joyous time.

Anyway..

I've said it before, he's the don't make a fuss birthday guy {eye roll}. I don't understand it, so I just ignore his silly requests. I wanted to throw him an intimate, thai inspired, backyard dinner with low tables and cushions under a marquee with his closest friends.. of course that was quashed and the day came and went with much normalcy (outside of the big bunch of helium balloons and decorations the kids and I made).

He was deep into a shitty patch of work and it turned out we thought we would have to sing happy birthday and have his cake for breakfast the morning of his birthday, because we wouldn't see him for the rest of the day. Now I don't mind eating cake for breakfast one little bit, but it felt pretty sad that we were going to be apart for the whole day with no evening celebration. We had a special dinner the night before, just in case, and were delighted when he managed to make it home on his birthday for a whole hour to inhale homemade pizzas and eat cheesecake. Who cares if it was 4.30 in the afternoon. Hurrah!

I knew my parents were going to be in town in May and took my cue to request their expertise for an overnight babysitting stint, of which they happily obliged. Our FIRST night away from the kids since becoming parents six and a half years ago! Sad but true. A belated birthday gift for the man who doesn't want any fuss.

There was much (work related) drama to actually get him there - something that was MEANT to be a surprise but had to end up telling him about the morning of.. can you tell I have a hate/hate relationship with his job? There was anger and tears and something along the lines of why can't we be like normal people and spend a night away from our children once in a blue moon with zero drama attached?? WHHHYYYYYY?

Once the drama was behind us and we made our way into the city, I breathed out all those shitty feelings about my plans having crumbled and time having been lost because of his bloody job.. and all was fine. Night fell and the city lit up. It was a strangely balmy autumn evening, perfect for strolling the streets and laneways hand in hand, and walking the banks of the river. We ate dinner leisurely, and talked about things that had been put on the back burner for so long. We joined the crowds on the streets and bridges, heading to and from drinks, dinners, plays, musicals, celebrations.. feeling as though we had stepped into another world - far away from the one we knew. Just for a night.

Just being together with no interruptions, even when there were moments with no conversation, was so rejuvenating. Taking time to look at each other properly, and really listen to and engage in a conversation with full attention was just so wonderful. Plans were made and focus shifted and somehow things felt clearer without three little voices pulling our attention away. Even when there were no issues with our relationship prior to our little getaway (apart from not having seen each other much) it still brought us closer together. We both felt it, without having to say it.

When was the last time you spent a night away from the kids with your love? I will absolutely, positively not wait another six and a half years before we do it again, that's for sure!

In the spirit of all things lovey dovey, I mentioned this song last week, but he's made it official in the studio and now you can buy it on iTunes. Seriously, it's better than the original (sorry Bey Bey). Give me a musician and a deep, silky voice any day and I'm there. Baby, love me lights out..

love / an uberfine giveaway

So Valentine's Day will arrive at the end of the week and florists worldwide will have their busiest and most profitable day of the year. Hearts will overflow - or be broken.

Personally, this day on the calendar is just like any other. The husband and I have been together for ten years, married for eight of them. I could probably count on both hands the amount of times he has bought me flowers. But the amount of times he has bought chocolate home for me from the supermarket during a 10pm milk run? I've lost count.

Cleaning the kitchen EVERY evening after dinner (not even clean dishes left to air dry). That's love.
Vacuuming the house every weekend. That's love.
Putting a load of washing on before work, and waiting to hang it out. That's love.
Changing our bed sheets every Sunday morning. That's love.
Walking in the door after a long day at work and immediately tidying away the kids' toys. That's love.
Picking up fish and chips every Friday night on the way home from work so I can have a night off. That's love.
And he knows how much I love him. Because I tell him every day.

However you feel about love--whether it be the Hallmark kind or the real kind--the lovely Kate of Uberkate and Uberfine would like to make your V-Day a little sweeter.

Ruby feels she can wear my Uberfine Inner Heart better than I can..

Kate would like to share an Uberfine Inner Heart with one of my lovely readers. It could be you! Just leave me a comment answering the same question my smalls did - What is Love?

This giveaway will be short and sweet. Winner will be drawn Friday evening, 14 February. Best answer wins!

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Wow, you guys! That was so much fun reading all your answers as they came in--you almost made it too hard for me to choose!

But choose I must. So.. the winner is.. MICHELLE! (and I hope hubby took the new runners out of the bin eventually!)

Please leave me your email address and the lovely girls at Uberkate will be in touch very soon.

Thanks to all for entering!

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Keep up to date with all of Kate's creations on her website, Facebook page and Instagram feed.

a whole decade

Yesterday marked a whole decade spent with the husband. In a little over a month we will have been married for eight years. We don't celebrate the getting together anniversary, but as I was filling out the calendar for this month, it dawned on me that it was a more significant date than other years because we had reached double digits. Ten years seemed like such a long time. But short too. TEN YEARS. I remember events and memories that occurred before we were together and they don't feel like they happened over a decade ago. Suddenly, the tick of the clock feels louder. Father Time, I thought it was already loud enough, thankyou very much.

The day began woefully. Grumpy children, equally grumpy mother, chasing, yelling, scrambling for school drop off. I am positive Missy was a snail in a former life. I was broken in less than an hour after getting out of bed. Hubby has been working late nights this week on site so have been afforded his help in the mornings while he catches up on sleep and is able to hang around at home a little longer.

I dropped Ruby at school and headed for the shops to run a handful of errands, alone. I headed straight for the familiar, friendly face of my coffee lady. Whose name I don't know but we always share a warm chat and I never have to actually order because she begins at the machine as soon as she sees me. I always feel better after seeing her. Not only because she is handing me my drug, that will lift my morning instantly, but because she is such a genuinely lovely soul. When she asks how I am, she is asking because she really wants to know. She asks with full eye contact. She waits for my answer. I always tell her the truth. She peeks over the counter on her tippy toes to check for the boys, and agrees we all need some time out - even if only for barely an hour, even if only to restock the nappies, milk and fruit bowl. She punches my coffee card twice. She bids me farewell and wishes me a lovely day - until next time, my friend.

That lonely hour was all I needed yesterday. To turn my foul mood and loud head into a quieter, clearer place. The handful of jobs were done. It was freezing out, and we didn't have to be anywhere until school pick up. We did some washing, made playdough, baked a cake, made soup, zucchini and chorizo slice, the best sweet potato mash I've ever made, and cooked some rice ready for sushi rolling for school this morning. None of that would have happened if I didn't have that little time out earlier in the day. I would have continued to be horribly foul and gone round in circles all day long.

Kids were in bed easily, I sat down for The Block. I kissed the husband goodbye again as he headed out to finish this week's job until the wee hours of this morning. It was only after he left that I remembered our little milestone.

Shamefully, I got stuck watching Formal Wars while waiting for Bridesmaids to come on the box. I hoped to God I was shaping my daughter in a way that would see her senior school formal focussed on an awesome party with her friends, celebrating their youth and some of the best years of her life, rather than crying over the fact that her breasts won't be falling out of her dress enough or that her shoes are only three inches high instead of six. Mostly, I was just grateful she's five.

Even though I went to bed alone last night - not ideal for any anniversary (whether celebrated or not) - I still went to bed happy. Hubby was there when I needed him to allow me a little time for myself, to shake my foul mood and be a better mother to our children for the remainder of the day. To turn what would have been a completely useless day into a really productive one. It seems like such a tiny thing, but in the scheme of things - the daily grind of routine with smalls - it's those little things we must grab hold of.

I don't take time out enough for myself. Not nearly enough. It would be made easier if we lived near my parents, of that I am sure. One day it will be real. It really will.

Do you take enough time for yourself? How long have you and hubby/partner been together?

jazz hands

Do you dance in the shower? The kind where you're queen of the dance floor? Pulling out moves you wouldn't dare try at your relo's wedding because the guest list just isn't the crowd to appreciate such greatness? All eyes on you cause you're THAT damn good? Me too. Last night my silky moves were courtesy of the shady tone and (equally shady) lyrics of one Robin Thicke. The shadiness stops at Pharrell. The man is just plain COOL. My sister and I had a funny exchange via text following Thicke's performance earlier in the week on The Voice finale. Forgive my lack of musical knowledge but he wasn't what either of us were expecting. Leaving his arrogance, poor facial grooming and head-stuck-up-his-own-arse GOLD microphone aside, the man oooooozed confidence. I found him - or perhaps his hips - strangely attractive and disturbing all at once. But that's not important. The song's killer and my bathroom tiles appreciate the performance. Every single time.

In other music news this week at Chateau P, my one true musical love Johnny, released the first single from his latest, upcoming album Paradise Valley. It would appear he's still channelling his cowdy phase which is okay by me. August can't come fast enough. While doing some editing last night, Spotify played this for me - on repeat. I listened to the same song for three hours. I am not sure Joanna should be prancercising in public and I have no idea what John was thinking when he coined the idea for this video.. but that's not important. The song's killer and my bathroom tiles will appreciate the forthcoming performances. Every single time. Yes, there's an echo in here.

Meanwhile.. we should seriously consider bringing back the high waisted legging. Or is that a unitard? Whatever it is, the belt finishes it all off perfectly. Bust a move. Or prancercise. Whatevs. Just DANCE.

photography love :: part two

I look at a lot of photography blogs and websites. There are so many styles and techniques to be seen, sometimes it's all too much and I have to walk away from the computer. So much talent, so much creativity, so much confidence. How is there room for everybody? With all that creative flair? Truckloads of it. What makes us different? What makes us stand out from the rest? Honestly - sometimes nothing. Sometimes nothing to one person - but sometimes, something profound to another. And that's the beauty of photography. It lies in the eye of the beholder. There are so many stories to be told, so much emotion to be felt, so much beauty to be seen.

It seems like too long since I shared my last bunch of favourites. So here are some more creatives (or creative collaborations) I have been watching for a long time, or a little. Hopefully some will be new to you and you will be able to read their stories for the first time, their picture books, their tales. Maybe you will find nothing. Maybe you too, will find something profound. Something to make your breath catch in the back of your throat. To make you stop scrolling and linger. Linger, and hear the story - feel the emotion - see the beauty.

Unlike last time, I'm not going to tell you anything about these talented folk. If you feel the desire, you'll find your own way. You'll click through to their little spaces on the web and you'll find magic, or you won't. Simple as that. Enjoy.

El Hogan // Wildflowers Photography // Lakshal Perera // The Itchy Eyes // You are my wild // The Parsons // Lamb Loves Fox // Kristen Marie // Bek Grace // Jessica Deane // Deanna McCasland // Ben Adams // Kids Were Here

*In most instances I have linked through to their blogs rather than their websites because that's where I like to adventure. I feel, that's where they let you in and give you more of themselves..

v day

Do you celebrate Valentine's Day? One of those that make today the most sickly romantic day of the year? It seems quite normal - a regular behaviour for such a day. It barely registers on my calendar. It serves to remind me that my brother in law's birthday is the day before, and that two years ago, I was praying that Eliot did not choose such a date to make his grand entrance into this world. Thankfully he decided the sixteenth would be a far better date to declare his birthday. Thankyou my little love.

My husband used to be more romantic. In those first years we were together. Which is pretty normal I think. Seven years into married life, and nine together in total, the definition of romance has changed somewhat and V Day is non existent for us. Occasionally he will surprise me with a bunch of flowers or a card, but I never expect anything. And neither does he. And I'm totally okay with that. I find the day a little strange to be honest. All the heart shaped confectionary and singing stuffed toys. Plenty may feel differently, but I don't need to be showered with flowers or chocolates or a fancy dinner for him to show me he loves me - or vice versa. We show and tell each other every day that our love is strong. Hubby is a quiet soul. He really only speaks if it's absolutely necessary. And even when it is absolutely necessary - he may still say nothing. He prefers useful action, to words.

If he has really busy weeks at work where he knows he will miss bedtime routine, and being able to spend time with the kids before they go to bed, he will do tasks and chores around home in the morning that will make my life easier at the end of the day, so that the evening schedule can run as smoothly as possible with one man down. Once dinner is done, my day of kitchen duty is officially over. He is chief cleaner and dishwasher stacker, restoring order swiftly and routinely. It seems he is forever folding and sorting washing. When I have thrown the towel in for the day, unable to move from the couch, he can be found in the other lounge room, folding and sorting clean clothes into piles to be put away while he watches the tele. I tell him it can wait till morning - he never listens. He says once it's done, it's done. If he goes to the shop on the way home from work, or after the kids are in bed, he returns with a chocolate surprise. He changes the sheets every Sunday morning. He is in charge of the vacuuming. He has a system as finely tuned as his evening Operation Clean Kitchen. He does the washing without being asked. Some weekends he is the only one near the washing machine. Weekdays, he will wait in the mornings to hang it out, before he heads to work because he knows it will be one less thing on my to-do-list for the day. He will bust his arse at work on a Tuesday so that he can leave early to take Ruby to her dance class.

Hubby comes from quite a conservative family when it comes to open affection. Which is perhaps why he is the complete opposite in his adulthood. He has always been open with public displays of affection and craves touch to feel loved. The PDAs do not extend to sending beautiful big bunches of flowers to my workplace (pre kids of course) to declare his undying love. However, he did propose on the top of the Summit at Mt Buller in front of quite a number of strangers.

I'll take my dish washing, clothes sorting, bed making hubby over a flower and chocolate giving one, any day.

photo by Tim

father's day

A sleep in for dad
Breakfast in bed
Handmade gifts
Of course something that must be returned..
Healesville Sanctuary
Sunshine
Chinos and gingerbread
Fish and chips
Chasing

A spontaneous decision to stay into the evening to ward off yet another late, late afternoon sleep by all three, was so very clever. Well done me. A dark, peaceful drive home, with happy hearts, sore legs and a bit of dirt carried into their beds. I do love morning baths anyway.