Sunday, 17 February 2013


Or lack thereof.

While on holidays, I had the time to sit down and empty out the contents of my head into a notebook. At least, the contents that had anything to do with tasks and to-do-lists. Quite therapeutic really. There were lists made of what I wanted to achieve by the end of January, around the home, for better organisation, and for this here blog. I wrote a list of at least a dozen, maybe fifteen, posts that I wanted to get out. Get out quickly. Because I wanted them here in this space - for memories for myself, for the kids, or simply to share with you lovely folk. I think I have managed to write two of them. I mean I still haven't done a holiday or christmas wrap?! {Watch this space for a Christmas in February post. Totally acceptable.} This whole school plus kindy routine is as time consuming as I expected. And just as exhausting. But the reality of actually feeling that exhaustion is something else. Throw in a week of solo parenting and my sights are set firmly on getting through the day meeting pick up and drop off times, feeding seemingly forever hungry children, making it to bedtime with as little yelling as possible, and falling in a heap on the couch. Blogging or working never made it into my sights. Remember I told you I was going to fill you in on the big first days? Yep. We're about to start week THREE.

I know there was always going to be an adjustment period. For them, and for me. Just the thought of school pick up gives me a headache. Having to go so bloody early to get a park in a side street because the car park traffic moves like a snail out a single lane exit, get the pram out, hike up the hill to wait for the bell, fight my way into the prep building to collect her (what a preposterous notion for like minded PARENTS to be considerate of OTHER PARENTS who have to strap small escapee children into prams for pick up), stroll back to the car in the searing heat of the afternoon sun (because strolling is all her weary little legs will allow), pack the pram back into the car, strap the kids in, drive three minutes home. Yep. And yet the morning drop off is so easy - quick even! It's still too hot to walk to collect her - for them AND me - and she is just too tired to even contemplate riding her bike or scooter the few blocks home at the moment. Hello, Autumn? Are you there? We're ready for you! We want to walk for school pick up! It would be a bloody sight faster!!

I feel tired. A combination of actual exhaustion from too many late nights and early mornings being the only parent here to do everything, and denial. Does being in denial make you tired? I think so. Our days have changed. Every stay at home mum/dad out there will tell you the same if they've just sent their firstborn off to school. It's weird. And I don't like it. Especially when she says to me, mum, it's such a looong day - there's not much time for playing - there's so much learning. It's a steep learning curve for us all. The boys miss her, I miss her - hubby carries on as normal - his daily routine untouched by this huge shift. She is enjoying herself. She loves her teacher, she has friends in her class, she's come home with stickers for doing so well that day, there's been sport! art! library! Some afternoons she talks so fast to get all the words out, to share the excitement of her day, learning all the new things. Her eyes light up and away she goes, barely stopping to catch her breath.

The hours are disappearing, the days are disappearing. And I am feeling a little overwhelmed by it all. I haven't really been here for a while, in this little space - properly. Just flitting in to dump a few photos, a short tale and I'm on my way. And I don't like it. I don't feel like I'm giving this little space the love it deserves, that it has grown so accustomed to. So I'm calling it an early night and heading to bed. With the hope of a bright new day awaiting me, a fresh start to the week. I fear school pick up won't improve this week, thanks to more thick, Melbourne heat on the horizon, but hubby is home again and all is right. We will welcome dear friends for a quick mid week stay before they jet off on holiday, we will prepare for a belated little party for our darling birthday boy, I will make more time to spend here to help with that overwhelming feeling, and we will get better at {accepting} our new routine.

If you've started a new routine in the past few weeks, I'd love you to share - are you finding it difficult to adjust?

*Tiny wooden camera from here. You can also find them here. One of Eliot's sweet birthday presents.


  1. Tahnee I hope your days get a little lighter soon :) and as for beckoning autumn a little closer - wait until the rain starts to poor right on pick up time and you have your pick up routine to get through! I don't want to scare you but as a teacher I see flustered parents all the time :) You'll get into a groove... So this is what I have to look forward to next year?!

    Sophie xo

    1. oh sophie - I know! we will have a small window of opportunity to enjoy the short walk home before we will need the umbrellas and be back to the hideous drive-three-blocks-pick-up! oh the joys.. another reason to head north - more sun, less rain ;) x

  2. Oh new routines are as exciting as they are stressful. My little miss is at three year old kinder - first time in care and even that has been an adjustment period for us. I feel a little lost without her to be honest but trying to lap up the one-on-one time I'm getting with my 16-month-old for the first time. Change can't always be prepared for - just don't know how you'll feel and that I think makes it hard! Hope your days feel lighter and get cooler too Tahnee. I love your blog space xx

  3. Your space is well and truly alive tonight, I appreciate the virtual companionship whilst I pull a very late night to complete a report for my PhD. When will I learn?!
    I detest change of routine, it leaves me feeling all squirmy and sickly on the inside, not nice. I finally have a nice groove happening now Derek is back to work and I have established a routine for my working day at home, feels good. I'm sure your happy place will return soon enough once you guys have your groove with this new change of pace. Big changes. Lots of love your way.

  4. There is so much newness to take in. I learned around this time last year, when I was having a rought time, to just drop the things that were adding to that feeling off being overwhelmed. Ok, I know there is not much we can do about the escapee children at School drop offs (Mila is obsessed with the water fountains!), but I've really taken it easy with everything else. I've managed to find my feet with Ruby's schedule, and am slowly adding Jenson's and Mila's activities on top. Like you, I've not blogged as often as I would have liked, and my notebook still sits bare, but I'm letting that be OK for now. Instead relishing in the quiet times I have either with the kids or Johnny.
    Go gently dear friend. Big hugs xo


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